New Zealand first leader Winston Peters is under heavy fire after the New Zealand Herald published emails suggesting Peters lied about accepting loans from billionaire Labour Party supporter Owen Glen. How is Winston handling the affair?
- Monday 2:00 PM: Hires two identical twins as press secretaries, one of whom always tells the truth while the other always lies.
- Tuesday 9:15 AM: Storms down press gallery corridor, bursts into Audrey Youngs office, slams door shut behind him and then breaks down and cries like a little girl.
- Wednesday 11:30 AM: Announces to press conference that he will explain everything but in doing so will be forced to reveal the secret surprise ending to Battlestar Galactica. Political media beg him to remain silent.
- Thursday 6:35 PM: Notifies Speaker Margaret Wilson that he is officially changing his alignment to Neutral Evil.
- Friday 10:30 AM: Recieves report back from Department of Statistics confirming that proportion of New Zealanders with IQ below 90 is still greater than 5%. Laughs heartily. Tells rest of country to go fuck themselves.
Not “Chaotic Evil”?
Comment by Chris Smith — July 17, 2008 @ 10:26 am
What’s the percentage with IQs under 30? I’m wondering how United Future will do.
Comment by llew — July 17, 2008 @ 10:33 am
I’m wondering how United Future will do.
The toxic levels of mercury and lead in the Johnsonville and Tawa drinking water ensures Dunne will maintain his seat.
Comment by danylmc — July 17, 2008 @ 1:03 pm
[...] Dim Post has more satire, this one on how Winston is handling the Owen Gelnn [...]
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