The Dim-Post

September 24, 2008

Your Urgent Help Needed

Filed under: satire — danylmc @ 7:58 am
Tags:

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a
transfer of funds of great magnitude.
I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had
crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion
dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most
profitable to you.
I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my
replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may
know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the
1990s. This transactin is 100% safe.
This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds
as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names
of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family
lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person
who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.
Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account
numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to
wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for
this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with
detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the
funds.
Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson

From AngryBear

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2 Comments »

  1. Dear Rich ex-pat Kiwi

    I urgently need your assistance in a matter of financial delicacy.

    I have recently been emroiled in legal issues and bruhahaha regarding the ‘wine in box’ scam and i am facing hooge bills i ca’nt paye…cud u plzz help? Need $NZ100,000 urgently.

    Plz contact mi lawyer who will accept with no thanks.

    We will, of course deny all nowlige of this payment shuld we get caught. an we will do everything to malign you if we are asked ’bout it so as to keep it lookin innocent.

    yrs

    Winston (named after a brit hero – so I can be trusted. believe me)

    Comment by Dave Mann — September 24, 2008 @ 8:55 am

  2. McCain’s latest gambit may or may not pay off for him but even though the finance crisis should be a gift for Obama McCain is still keeping the race close –

    http://www.gallup.com/poll/110668/Gallup-Daily-Race-Back-Tie-46-Each.aspx

    and some interesting analysis of the state of play in New Hampshire –

    http://www.mydd.com/story/2008/9/24/142053/582

    So in a year that the Dems have everything going for them McCain is still in the running. The Rep hierachy hate McCain but they certainly had the good sense to choose him in spite of that.

    Comment by Neil — September 26, 2008 @ 7:15 am


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