You've Already Lost: The TV3 Leaders Debate Drinking Game

Take one sip:

• Every time Clark insists that the current financial meltdown is not her fault. (Take two sips if
• Key interrupts to explain that it is actually totally his fault.)
• Clark says flip.
• Or flop.
• Key tells us the election is about trust.
• Clark tells us the election is about leadership.
• “Labour’s five headed hydra!”
• “National’s four headed one.”
• “H-fee”.
• Key rants about showers.
• Or lightbulbs
• “Nanny state”
• “Borrowing for tax cuts.”
• “Borrowing for infrastructure.”
• “Failed ideology of the 90′s”

Take two sips:

• If Clark mentions Lockwood Smith or Maurice Williamson
• If Key mentions Mike Williams
• Every time Clark promises some truly visionary sounding policy
• Every time Key asks her why she’s waited nine years to get around to it.
• If Clark maintains she doesn’t pay attention to polls

One shot:

• If Clark brings up Winston Peters
• If Key brings up Peter Dunne
• If Clark calls John Campbell a little creep
• If Key threatens Clark with his pimp hand

Chug:

• If Clark realises she’s losing, throws a smoke bomb to the ground and vanishes amidst the chaos
• Key rips off his latex face mask to reveal he’s actually Don Brash
• Clark sprays Key in the eyes with mace

Bonus Round:

• If Key takes the high road on campaign finance: choke yourself on a $9,990 wad of cash.
• If Clark calls Winston Peters an exceptional Foreign Minister: drink a bottle of whiskey and give all your savings to MFAT.
• If Key mentions his tax-cut policy: pay your American Express bill with your VISA card.

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