The Dim-Post

July 29, 2010

I got nothing

Filed under: Politics — danylmc @ 10:42 pm

I’ve been sitting at my PC trying to come up with a satirical piece on Chris Carter but my imagination fails me. Putting the worst coup attempt of all time to one side: what can you say about a guy who single handedly undermines his party every time they start to recover in the polls and then demands the leader’s head because the party isn’t performing well in the polls? I wonder how many points they would have climbed in the wake of National’s labour law reform announcement if the Village Idiot for Te Atatu hadn’t picked this week to hatch his brilliant revenge plot?

About these ads

23 Comments »

  1. It’s pretty beyond satire really, isn’t it? Thanks for trying though :-)

    Comment by Julie — July 29, 2010 @ 10:44 pm

  2. And that is not the first time, in fact I think it is number three
    Every time Labour looked to be able to get some traction up popped “the gift that keeps on giving”

    Comment by Raymond A Francis — July 29, 2010 @ 10:51 pm

  3. Yeah there’s nothing more really to be said. Plus it’s started to get to the pitiful stage so satire might be a bit nasty.

    I can’t even think of a good pun for the occasion (at least not any you wouldn’t delete..)

    Comment by gazzaj — July 29, 2010 @ 11:01 pm

  4. Satirists could not invent Chris Carter. They are not that stupid.

    Comment by peterlepaysan — July 29, 2010 @ 11:03 pm

  5. what can you say about a guy who single handedly undermines his party every time they start to recover in the polls and then demands the leader’s head because the party isn’t performing well in the polls?

    Yeah, but… he’s right. Carter’s fucked up repeatedly just as badly as Goff has failed to handle or take advantage of any of Key’s bollocks.

    That’s the irony of all this. It’s like Witi Ihimaera rocking up and saying Dan Brown’s a shit writer – it’s fucking true, but perhaps that isn’t the right person to be calling attention to it.

    Comment by dontsurf — July 29, 2010 @ 11:11 pm

  6. I’ve been running out a few headlines also and nothing’s sticking. Perhaps Chris panicked when he realised that Goff still picked out his handwriting on the envelope, despite his cunning ruse of not using smiley faces in all his ‘i’s and ‘j’s like normal. Trotter’s comment that Carter does not need a political analyst, but instead simply an analyst, seems pretty much on the money. So I’ve decided to wait a few days and see how Goff reacts over the next week. Because I doubt this is going away in a hurry.

    Comment by MCRAD — July 29, 2010 @ 11:41 pm

  7. dontsurf, sure, Goff is not likely to threaten National, but Carter’s belief that Labour can win the next election, if they “just replace Goff with someone better” is plain deluded.

    My thought was that Carter either has no friends left, or doesn’t listen – because if he had discussed this with anyone in the party they would have told him how stupid it was.

    Comment by gazzaj — July 29, 2010 @ 11:43 pm

  8. I think Carter’s after a bit of revenge and Goff looked a little rattled.

    Comment by NeilM — July 29, 2010 @ 11:50 pm

  9. Such weird stupidity implies that all the international travel wasn’t in the spirit of parliamentary service, so much as in the spirit of ” WOO-HOO, Let’s Go ! “

    Comment by Vibenna — July 29, 2010 @ 11:52 pm

  10. it’s an odd business. Carter gets sacked for saying what everyone else is saying – Goff can’t win the next election. Not for lying over whaling.

    Comment by NeilM — July 30, 2010 @ 12:05 am

  11. Wednesday Peters/Laws. Thursday Carter. Friday I’m in love (sang The Cure).

    Its seems too stupid to contemplate, but then Carter has sunk to a new level of stupid: Maybe Carter thinks the best leader for Labour, is Carter.

    Comment by Pat — July 30, 2010 @ 12:07 am

  12. Ironically, Goff looks stronger for finally firing Carter. It took a while.

    Comment by George D — July 30, 2010 @ 1:49 am

  13. It is a day which will live in infamy.

    Comment by Monkey Boy — July 30, 2010 @ 6:28 am

  14. The idiot from Te Atatu has just doubled down on Nat Rad and ZB this morning, and refused to answer questions about a trip to Tibet. Mallard all but admitted that the twit had been off on another tax payer funded jaunt to frickin Tibet.

    Does this guy have any self awareness.

    Comment by andy (the other one) — July 30, 2010 @ 7:22 am

  15. The most annoying thing about Carter is if the snickering around my office is any guide, the plonker is doing more to reinforce negative gay stereotypes than anything I can think of in the last ten years.

    Comment by Sanctuary — July 30, 2010 @ 8:02 am

  16. Now Carter is saying that perhaps he hand-wrote the letters because deep down, he wanted to be caught.

    The other option is that he’s a self-important fool. If there *was* a coup conspiracy, it’s sure as hell gone to ground now and he’s given Phil Goff a chance to show some spine. (And speaking of Goff, could someone please teach him how to walk so that he doesn’t look like he’s street-dancing to Staying Alive?)

    One question: How many (if any) one-term Governments have there been in NZ?

    Comment by Ataahua — July 30, 2010 @ 8:02 am

  17. Ataahua asked: “One question: How many (if any) one-term Governments have there been in NZ?”

    two that I know of – both Labour, both in the mid-20th century

    Comment by kahikatea — July 30, 2010 @ 8:24 am

  18. Can someone tell me, and this is a genuine question, was Chris Carter a good minister?

    I only ask because I really can’t remember. I remember a lot of controversy about the Whangamata marina, but not whether Carter actually handled it well or not – only that there was controversy.

    Has he always been this politically inept, or was actually a decent politician when Labour was in power?

    Comment by Jordan — July 30, 2010 @ 9:01 am

  19. A quote from Dr Cullen:

    “As long as he used a correctly placed postage stamp, I don’t see what the problem is”

    Comment by ZenTiger — July 30, 2010 @ 9:22 am

  20. I remember a lot of controversy about the Whangamata marina, but not whether Carter actually handled it well or not – only that there was controversy.

    There are bumper stickers in that town that read “Whangamata will not bend over for Chris Carter”

    Comment by mjl — July 30, 2010 @ 10:32 am

  21. You could have always taken this approach Danyl.

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/muscleman-put-in-charge-of-worlds-fifthlargest-eco,877/

    Comment by Richard — July 30, 2010 @ 6:16 pm

  22. I did think about that – but I already played that card on April Fools Day.

    http://dimpost.wordpress.com/2010/04/01/government-to-dig-up-conservation-areas/

    Comment by danylmc — July 30, 2010 @ 7:08 pm

  23. “what can you say about a guy who single handedly undermines his party every time they start to recover in the polls and then demands the leader’s head because the party isn’t performing well in the polls”

    That he is emulating Maurice Williamson when Bill
    English was leader in the early 2000’s – this is Carter’s deep strategy to become a minster again in 10 years.

    Comment by Michael — August 1, 2010 @ 8:13 pm


RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

The Rubric Theme. Blog at WordPress.com.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 413 other followers

%d bloggers like this: