The Dim-Post

June 11, 2013

Get ready to pinch the hell out of the bridge of your nose

Filed under: general idiocy — danylmc @ 2:02 pm

Chris Trotter muses on Peter Dunne’s downfall.

These extraordinary events have the shape and feel of a very old and tragic tale. The bones of the story may be found in the mythology of every culture, but I first encountered it in the legends of King Arthur and the Round Table. There it is called the tale of Merlin and Vivien.

It gets so much worse.

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8 Comments »

  1. I wish I could write satire of Chris Trotter as well as Chris Trotter does.

    But given that I can’t, writing ‘I WENT TO UNIVERSITY’ on a cricket bat and hitting people in the face with it works tolerably well.

    Comment by Hugh — June 11, 2013 @ 2:09 pm

  2. “For there is much in politics that still carries the whiff of magic.”

    Gold.

    Comment by Gregor W — June 11, 2013 @ 3:37 pm

  3. @Hugh – You can tell he’s also a working class hero because of the ‘Dunne Done-in’ in the title though.

    Comment by Jess — June 11, 2013 @ 3:39 pm

  4. Trotter will no doubt appreciate the thickness of his skin given the elegant vapidness of you sensitive ones.

    Comment by paritutu — June 11, 2013 @ 4:05 pm

  5. If Dunne is Merlin, Vance is Vivien, then is Trotter NZ’s political Sir Dagonet?

    Comment by Flashing Light — June 11, 2013 @ 4:46 pm

  6. But the last sentence by Trotter is worth noting:
    “It may have been Ms Vance’s own magic that persuaded Mr Dunne to contemplate (at the very least) sharing secret information with her newspaper, but we would be foolish to rule out the possibility that she was working with more than just one political wizard.

    Comment by xianmac — June 11, 2013 @ 5:18 pm

  7. Bravely bold Sir Robin
    Rode forth from Camelot.
    He was not afraid to die,
    Oh brave Sir Robin.
    He was not at all afraid
    To be killed in nasty ways.
    Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin.

    He was not in the least bit scared
    To be mashed into a pulp.
    Or to have his eyes gouged out,
    And his elbows broken.
    To have his kneecaps split
    And his body burned away,
    And his limbs all hacked and mangled
    Brave Sir Robin.

    Comment by eT — June 11, 2013 @ 5:53 pm

  8. Would have been nice if he had gone for a modern day reimagining of Camelot with Eva Green as Andrea Vance. Oh well.

    Still there’s always Game of Thrones and so without further ado Warner Brothers & Wingnut Productions bring you Game of Thrones: New Zealand as adapted, produced and directed by Sir Peter Jackson.

    Starring:

    John Key as Tywin Lannister, the fabulously wealthy head of the Lannister clan but now wearying of keeping the Kingdom of Zealand together against endless warring factions, and dreaming of retirement;

    Steven Joyce as Jaime Lannister, Tywin’s favoured son and preferred successor. With his feared weapons scorn and polling, Jaime helped secured the throne for the Lannisters in 2008 and now wants to succeed Tywin. He faces unexpectedly strong opposition from his sister and former ally Cersei (played by Judith Collins)

    Aaron Gilmore is King Joffrey: no-one in his family wants to admit they sired this spiteful creature who, despite his title, is ignored by all, leaving him to wander the Halls of Parliament plaintively crying “Don’t you know who I am?”

    Bill English as Lord Petyr Baelish, the faithful master of coin who secretly still desires the succession. The Lannisters place huge faith in his financial wizadry but he knows that Winter is Coming bringing a deadly Current Account Deficit crisis which could spell ruin for all.

    Winston Peters is Walder Frey: a survivor, despised and untrusted by the nobles yet whose support is necessary for their survival.

    Peter Dunne as Stannis Baratheon the man who would be king but abandoned by Tywin Lannister after he fell under the spell of the Melisandre (newcomer Andrea Vance) and now under attack from Walder Frey.

    With Jim Anderton as Ned Stark, Helen Clark as Catelyn Stark and David Shearer as Robb Stark who with Blackfish (Russell Norman) and the Tully Clan plan to take the throne from the Lannisters.

    With cameos from Sir Peter Jackson as Samwell Tarley, Hekia Parata as the apparently unkillable Beric Dondarrion and John Banks as Roose Bolton

    And introducing Kim Dotcom as the White Walker whose deadly touch kills all who embrace him

    In Cinemas November 2014

    Finally a note for readers of the A Song of Ice and Fire series who might not like this adaptation and casting:
    Fuck off you tiresome twats

    Comment by TerryB — June 12, 2013 @ 8:47 am


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